Lethargic worry

Today I could sleep for England if it wasn't for the fact I was worried this morning.

Mild brown spotting at the beginning of the 5th week. Google has a lot to say about that, most of which consists of, 'normal in the first trimester'.

Doesn't stop you from having a twinge of panic, coupled with the fact I really couldn't face work today. I decided I could not leave my bed and phoned in sick.

Bed felt so good, the duvet was my nirvana albeit a naughty skivey one.

I discussed with G the spotting and wound myself up again and decided to get a pregnancy test to see how strong the line was.

Jeans on over pyjamas I sluggishly make my way to the chemist.

They flashed me a look over their bi focals that resembled a 'are you living on the streets?' look. I don't blame them, in a woollen hat and jumper in ill fitting lumpy jeans on a spring day, I would of thought the same.

A line struggles to appear but eventually does.

So now I officially worry and email Spain.

The HCG should of risen thus giving way for a pink beacon of a pink line to be captured by hubble surely?

Ruth advises me to have another HCG blood test just to make sure everything is progressing as it should. 'To hopefully reassure me'.

The 'oh so familiar' lime green sofas have been moved around the waiting room as if to trick me or make it seem that a greater length of time has passed rather than just a week.

'Oooooh hello hows things going?' the beaming blood lady has now upgraded herself to some blue pyjamas. Confessing as she tournequayed my arm, that she was a white witch and had a good feeling about me as she drained me of a little more blood.....

'yes you had good veins didn't you' 'You'll make a lovely mummy' she quipped.

I do feel so dreadfully tired and boobs are still very sore so am hoping this is a good sign, although you never know if fate as a wake up call lined up for you. A little reminder that life can also be exceedingly crap at times.

XXX

PS thanks for messages can you (broken) send me you blog address if you have one. Hope all is on the move for you I replied to you through my comments link, still haven't worked out how to use blogging things yet.